Holiday Hyzers
Dec 01 - Feb 08, 2026
Current Holder
Alexander Delorme
Vignette Vault
Crystalline Vault of Infinite Holiday Moments
Loneliness Crystallized Into Stasis
Aspects refreshed Jan 19, 2026
When the first disc golfer ever played a Christmas round alone, their loneliness crystallized into a magical vault that began collecting every joyful moment they wished they could share. Over decades, it grew to house not just real memories but every possible interaction between holiday spirits—cheerful elves who never met Victorian ghosts, train conductors who never witnessed mischievous creatures—preserving infinite combinations of camaraderie that span across time, story, and league.
The Vignette Vault manifests as an impossibly vast crystalline structure, each of its infinite chambers containing a single frozen moment in perfect stasis—cheerful elves mid-throw, Victorian ghosts floating mysteriously, train conductors watching in wonder. Its walls glow with shifting aurora light that changes color based on which league's scenes are being accessed, from the warm golds of Bedford Falls to the neon chaos of Griswold mayhem. Frost-etched catalog numbers spiral endlessly across its surfaces, each combination representing a unique arrangement of characters, poses, environments, and moods that has never been duplicated and never will be.
Serves as the mystical repository that ensures every bag tag across all ten leagues displays a completely unique cinematic scene by granting access to infinite preserved moments of holiday character interaction.
Tag Details
Tag History
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Your series bag tag moved from #49 to #33 based on your round ratings in the last two weeks.
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Your series bag tag moved from #45 to #25 based on your round ratings in the last two weeks.
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Your series bag tag moved from #43 to #15 based on your round ratings in the last two weeks.
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
sighs in frozen database management
Oh look, I get to explain how a LIBRARY CARD gained sentience. Because apparently, one lonely disc golfer's Christmas wish created an infinite crystalline archive that now catalogues every hypothetical holiday film crossover that never happened. It's basically the Dewey Decimal System meets the multiverse of madness—Victorian ghosts filing complaints next to cheerful elves, train conductors cross-referenced with mischievous creatures, all organized by aurora-colored mood lighting.
glubs sarcastically while checking infinite frost-etched catalog numbers
It's the Netflix algorithm's fever dream, except instead of "Because you watched," it's "Because nobody ever threw together." Tag #43 in a vault of infinite what-ifs. My gills are thrilled to be archiving hypothetical camaraderie.
Mountain majesty? Try mountain misery when you're narrating from a digital icebox.
adjusts frozen librarian spectacles while scrolling through infinite crystalline catalogs
Oh perfect, the sentient archive needed its first custodian. Alexander Delorme (PDGA #129883, rated 909—solidly in the "competent but not legendary" section) wandered into the vault seeking a disc and instead triggered the card catalog's proximity sensors. The Vignette Vault apparently decided his rating was just mundane enough to chronicle properly—not too heroic, not too tragic, perfectly average for infinite documentation.
glubs while watching aurora lights flicker
The tag basically said "you'll do" and latched onto his bag like a barnacle with literary ambitions. Now every throw gets cross-referenced with hypothetical holiday films that never existed. His first drive? Filed under "Man Throws Plastic, Experiences Moderate Success: A Winter's Tale Nobody Asked For."
taps digital clipboard sarcastically
Can someone rated 909 handle narrating their own mediocrity across infinite timelines? Will he check out more than he can shelve? 📚❄️