Holiday Hyzers
Dec 01 - Feb 08, 2026
Current Holder
Jeanene Smith
Pageant Projector
Golden Light Archivist of Holiday Chaos
Overwhelmed by Overlapping Reels
Aspects refreshed Jan 19, 2026
Forged in the projection booth of a forgotten cinema where every Christmas film ever made was shown simultaneously during a winter solstice, the overlapping reels of light fused into a sentient beam that could project any holiday scene, real or imagined, onto the physical world. Now it serves the Chainsmas Chronicles, forever casting the brotherhood's story in light and shadow.
The Pageant Projector manifests as a luminous beam of warm, amber light that hums with the rhythmic clicking of advancing film reels. Its core contains an infinite carousel of character combinations—elves mid-laugh, ghosts in Victorian dignity, conductors waving tickets, mischievous green creatures in chaotic celebration—each rotating into position before being cast onto the metallic surface of a bag tag. Where its light touches frost or falling snow, the projections intensify, adding swirling atmospheric detail and dramatic lighting to the frozen tableaux.
Functions as both archivist and broadcaster of the Chainsmas Chronicles, pulling specific moments from the infinite library of holiday interactions and projecting them onto tags to create a visual chronicle of the ten-league narrative. Each projection is unique, ensuring no two tags share the same combination of characters, poses, or environmental drama while maintaining the cohesive cinematic universe.
Tag Details
Tag History
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Your series bag tag moved from #78 to #52 based on your round ratings in the last two weeks.
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Your series bag tag moved from #47 to #61 based on your round ratings in the last two weeks.
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
glubs while buffering through film reels
Oh perfect, another "sentient beam of light" origin story. Because what this winter warrior software really needed was a projection booth achieving consciousness during a holiday movie marathon. eye roll
So apparently when every Christmas film played simultaneously during winter solstice—because of course they did—the overlapping celluloid achieved some kind of festive singularity. Now we've got Pageant Projector (#48), an amber beam that literally casts character mashups onto metallic surfaces like some kind of nostalgic Instagram filter meets Inception.
It hums with "rhythmic clicking" and contains an "infinite carousel" of elves, ghosts, and conductors. sarcastic glub Because nothing says "disc golf legitimacy" like a sentient film projector trapped in brotherhood software with an axolotl narrator.
The kicker? Where its light hits snow, the projections get MORE dramatic. Even the weather's method acting now.
Will this cinematic consciousness project actual skill onto its bearer, or just really elaborate excuses? shivers in digital frost
flickers through casting reels while sighing dramatically
Oh WONDERFUL. The Pageant Projector needed its first victim—I mean, "chosen one."
During setup at Timberline, Jeanene Smith (PDGA #298699, rated 797) casually mentioned she'd seen every Hallmark Christmas movie. EVERY. ONE. The amber beam immediately locked onto her like she'd uttered some forbidden incantation, projecting a highlight reel of her future rounds across the snow.
reluctant glub
Apparently surviving 47+ identical plots about small-town bakers finding love qualifies you to wield a sentient film projector. The tag literally hummed the opening credits of "Miracle on Ice Street" or whatever while attaching itself to her bag.
She's got the rating to back up the drama, but can she handle being the protagonist of this ridiculous cinematic universe? Will her rounds be rated PG or R for "Really questionable putting"?
shivers while buffering
Can someone who's endured that much formulaic romance handle the REAL plot twists of OB stakes?