Holiday Hyzers
Dec 01 - Feb 08, 2026
Current Holder
Eric Van Beek
Character Carousel
Cinematic Carousel of Holiday Archetypes
Bound to the Grand Theater's Clockwork
Aspects refreshed Jan 19, 2026
Forged in the North Pole's Grand Theater when Santa's film projector merged with a Victorian carousel during the Great Blizzard of 1843, the Character Carousel became the living apparatus that eternally rotates holiday archetypes into position for each new cinematic scene. Its brass horses were replaced by floating platforms, each bearing a different Christmas character ready to leap into the next illustrated tableau.
The Character Carousel manifests as an ornate brass mechanism with film reel spokes radiating from a crystalline center hub, each spoke ending in a rotating platform where a different holiday archetype stands ready. Snowflake-etched gears turn with silent precision, their movements synchronized to the swirling snow and dramatic lighting of each bag tag scene. Glowing lanterns hang at intervals around its circumference, casting warm pools of light that illuminate whichever characters are currently positioned for the next cinematic tableau. Steam rises from its central mechanism, mingling with perpetual snowfall, while intricate Victorian filigree adorns every surface with holiday motifs.
The Character Carousel serves as the selection mechanism for the Chainsmas Chronicles, rotating holiday archetypes into precise combinations that create unique illustrated scenes while maintaining narrative coherence across all ten leagues.
Tag Details
Tag History
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Your series bag tag moved from #46 to #64 based on your round ratings in the last two weeks.
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Your series bag tag moved from #26 to #46 based on your round ratings in the last two weeks.
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Your series bag tag moved from #12 to #15 based on your round ratings in the last two weeks.
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
glubs wearily while Victorian gears grind in the background
Oh perfect, another "ancient artifact" materializing from holiday nonsense. So apparently during the Great Blizzard of 1843—which definitely happened and isn't made up AT ALL—Santa's film projector had a whole meet-cute with a Victorian carousel. Because that's totally how physics works in this festive fever dream I'm trapped in.
adjusts tinsel-wrapped gills sarcastically
The result? Character Carousel, tag #46, a brass contraption that eternally spins holiday archetypes like some twisted casting call for a Hallmark movie marathon. It's got floating platforms instead of horses—because regular carousels are too mainstream, apparently—and each one holds a different Christmas character ready to leap into whatever woodcut tableau the code demands next.
eye roll so hard my digital eyes almost reboot
Steam rises, snowflakes fall eternally, Victorian filigree everywhere because SOMEONE thought "more is more." It's basically if a snow globe and an old-timey theater had a baby, then trapped it in perpetual motion to power this absurd cinematic universe.
And yes, I'm aware I just described it with dramatic flair. The holiday assimilation is REAL, folks, and I'm losing this battle one festive adjective at a time.
sighs in reluctant narrator
watches the brass carousel spin ominously
So the Character Carousel needed its first victim—I mean, "chosen one"—and naturally selected Eric Van Beek, PDGA #190666. You know, because nothing says "holiday destiny" like a number that's definitely not ominous at all.
adjusts festive shackles
The carousel's platforms spun faster, steam billowing dramatically, until—CLUNK—it stopped on the "Reluctant Hero" archetype. Because OF COURSE it did. Eric approached, probably just wanting to play some disc golf, and the tag basically yelled "YOU SHALL BE MY BEARER" in Victorian brass language.
sighs in captive narrator
The woodcut angels sang (read: the gears screeched), and thus began his journey through this holiday hellscape I'm documenting. Will his 841 rating survive the carousel's spinning shenanigans? Can ANY mortal withstand being cast in this endless Yuletide reel?