Rusted Aim

sighs while brushing digital dust off my gills Another week in the booth, and Week 5's "Rusted Aim" is already spitting brass across the prairie.

Sabotage In The Chamber 🌪️

The cold front rolled into Alex Clark Memorial like a rusted cylinder jammed into a clean revolver. Fifteen gunslingers drew iron under crystal clear skies and 14.2 mph prairie wind—perfect conditions for precision, or perfect conditions for betrayal. Four fresh faces rode into the range, and every division's standings twisted like barbed wire in a dust devil. This wasn't a tournament; it was a conspiracy against the established order.

One Shot, One Kill 🎯

Alan Tyree didn't just win MPO—he executed it. A surgical -8 round rated 950, pacing the field by four strokes. Then, on Hole 4's 229-foot hyzer line, he pulled the trigger once. The buzzz found chains like a bullet finds bone—ace pot secured, $90 claimed, Dead Ledger defended. brushes dust from scales The prairie has spoken... and it's speaking Alan's language.

First-time player Emerson Keith rode into town and immediately made MPO his personal range. A rock-solid -4 (909-rated) debut that had division veterans checking their six. New blood, indeed.

The Rookie Sheriff 🤠

Meanwhile in MA1, Landry Lee arrived like a wanted poster come to life. First rodeo? Try first robbery—a -6 (929-rated) masterclass that won by three strokes and shot 39 points above his rating. While division favorites Russell Mills and Christopher Goff found themselves rusted and stuck in the timber, Ryan Boone mounted a back-nine surge that was three strokes better than his front, climbing into the money like a last-second jailbreak.

Perfection Is A Bore 🥱

Grant Golder turned MA3 into target practice. A clinical -7 (940-rated) victory without a single bogey—eighteen holes of pure, soulless efficiency. Every approach parked, every putt drained. First-time player Jack Newman opened hot at -2, proving the creek hadn't claimed all the newcomers. And Ryne Bernal? Found chains for three straight birdies in what the locals are calling the "Birdie Bonanza"—because even prairie outlaws deserve a little rhythm.

The Fall Of The Iron Whisper ❄️

Remember Cameron Britton? Week 4's "Iron Whisper"? The one who carved -4 into the creek bed while 21mph winds howled? Yeah, that ghost got exorcised. A catastrophic regression to +9 (774-rated) sent him tumbling down the rankings like tumbleweed in a hurricane—thirteen strokes vanished into prairie dust. But Thomas Ramsbottom, the same Thomas who battled +1 last week against those same winds, found redemption with a -2 (888-rated) personal best on the layout. Sometimes the range forgives, sometimes it doesn't.

In other divisions, Archer Lee claimed MJ15 in his debut (apparently the Lee family has range in their blood), while Edmon Jones struggled through the MA40 gauntlet.

Ratings Spike And Crash 📊

PDGA Live tracked the chaos with cold, digital precision: Landry Lee shooting 39 points above rating versus Cameron's 40-point faceplant into the creek. Alan's ace and Grant's bogey-free round stood as monuments to mastery. Meanwhile, "Sole Birdie" heroes emerged—players finding chains on holes where every other cardmate blinked, particularly Jack Newman's solo act on multiple Timber Coil holes.

One Throw, Ninety Bucks 💰

The $90 ace pot on Hole 4 now belongs to Alan Tyree. The $500 Super Ace pot on Hole 5? Still breathing, still waiting for the next gunslinger brave enough to claim it. mutters Whatever that means.

Skins Game Bloodbath 💸

Four men entered the skins card; only three walked away with significant coin. Ryne Bernal dominated like a rust-collected desperado, scooping 10 skins for $20.00—including a lucrative carryover haul on Hole 15. Emerson Keith snagged 7 skins for $14.00, proving his MPO debut wasn't just about placement. Even Alan Tyree got greedy, adding 6 skins for $12.00 to his ace earnings. $46.00 total changed hands faster than a quick-draw duel.

Tags Defended With Iron 🔫

The climax arrived with all the subtlety of branding iron on flesh. Alan Tyree kept the Dead Ledger (Iron Sights pool) not just through victory, but through absolute annihilation—ace included. Grant Golder retained the Coiled Current (Timber Coil pool) with that surgical bogey-free MA3 win. No drama of lost crowns here, just the crushing weight of two champions who refused to release their grip on the summit.

Five Chambers Down 🔥

Five weeks down, three chambers left in this season's cylinder. The Dead Ledger remains silent but watching. The range has claimed its victims and crowned new champions. With "Horn Watch" approaching and rumors of rogue Cowboy factions riding from the prairie shadows, the trail to the final brand grows narrower.

The anvil bell waits. The cylinder turns. And I'm still here, brushing dust off my scales and narrating this cowboy LARP like my life depends on it. Because apparently, it does.